


Love Me Until I Forget

by blushinglovely



Category: Yellowstone (TV 2018)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:41:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26245072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blushinglovely/pseuds/blushinglovely
Summary: My imaginings of what happened after season 2, episode 10. Beth can’t sleep and keeps having flashbacks to her attack so she seeks out Rip.
Relationships: Beth Dutton/Rip Wheeler
Comments: 3
Kudos: 42





	Love Me Until I Forget

As Kasey Dutton returned to the ranch with Tate, the Dutton Ranch itself seemed to take a breath, a sigh of relief. A cool breeze rolled down off the mountains that cleansed the day yet whispered the chill of having to continue to fight. There was no grand celebration of Tate’s return, however relief was felt all around. Tate would need time to heal and affection and patience from his parents, but everyone believed he would be alright. 

That afternoon as the ranch house slowed and quieted even more Beth stepped outside and, as she expected, saw Rip within shouting distance. It was the first time she’d laid eyes on him since sharing the letter from her father with him. She was tired, so tired from the past week’s events and she enjoyed thinking of a time when she’d be able to rest without thinking of ways to defend or protect her father’s great legacy. However, she knew the ranch meant so much to Rip, too. It was now truly his home and that was her only sad thought about selling the ranch one day. As they parted ways, he offered to keep her company if she slept for a year after selling the ranch one day as she hoped. She smiled as he walked away and pulled her coat tight and walked back into the family lodge. 

Hands gripped Beth’s thighs, pain exploded in her check, her breath came in a large gasp as she awoke from the horrible dream. She gripped the sheet to her chest demanding her brain to connect to the real world as she seemed to relive the attack that happened in her office just a week ago. Was it possible that only 1 week had passed since the attack? So much had happened since then with Tate’s kidnapping and the men in her family hunting down and fighting his kidnappers to rescue him. It seemed that everyone making it home safe (at least physically, although she knew there would be trauma) had allowed her mind to reconnect tonight. It was the first night without the adrenaline left from her own attack or the fear of what had happened to Tate to keep her awake. For a week her mind had only allowed Beth small bits of fitful sleep. But tonight her body had seemed to relax as soon as she hit the pillow. On the verge of near exhaustion she was sound asleep by 10:00 (early by Beth standards if not ranch life standards). Only to be plagued by the flashback by 10:30. Her hands gripped the covers so tightly they ached as she tried to ground herself and convince her mind she was in her bedroom at the ranch not on the table in her office with the grotesque man leaning over her after he had hit her everywhere imaginable. 

She continued to fight the panic as she racked her brain for a way to control her emotions. What she needed most was to shake the memory of the hired man’s physical touch. The physical pain left as cuts and bruises Beth could deal with, but the memory of his touch was eating away at her soul. The first two nights after her attack she had rested fitfully, but had no nightmares as she felt Rip’s warmth and his steady breathing beside her in her bed. In reflection, even in his drug-induced deep slumber as he gunshot wounds healed, his body laying beside her gave her comfort and reassurance and keep the wolves at bay. Looking to take control of the situation Beth slid her feet to the floor and reached for the jeans she had worn earlier today. She didn’t bother to fully dress, merely slipping the jeans on under her short slip style night gown, pulling on her boots and pulling on her coat with the fur collar over her nightgown.   
She slipped out of the house and used the light of the moon and her cell phone to guide her path to Rip’s new house. 

Walking up the front porch steps Beth almost lost her will. But she straightened her back and knocked rapidly on the door before she could change her mind. She had almost turned to leave by the time Rip had slid on jeans and a shirt and made his way to the door. When he turned on the porch light and opened the door his heart skipped a beat as he saw the haunted look in Beth’s eyes. “What’s wrong, Beth? Is someone hurt?” Rip asked as his mind went down the list of what he’d need to grab to be prepared to fight. 

“Everyone is safe back at the lodge. Nothing is wrong” Beth replied without making eye contact. A shiver ran down through her body and she couldn’t control the shake it gave her.   
Rip opened the door wider and said “Come in before you get any colder, Beth”. He closed the door and ran his hands up and down the sleeves of her coat to warm her. Willing her to make eye contact he asked, “Beth, are you ok?”

She leaned in against his chest to fiddle with the 2 buttons he’d gotten buttoned on his shirt in his rush to answer the knock at the door, “Rip, I can’t sleep, I haven’t really slept in a week. I’m calling in your offer to join me” she said with a smile that didn’t meet her eyes.   
Taking in the remaining cuts and bruises on her face and neck, he stroked the back of his hand gently over her right check, “Woman, you know I’m happy to join you. But there’s something else bothering you, Beth, you might as well tell me.”  
Beth took a breath, willing herself to be strong, hating the emotion in her voice as she whispered, “I need you to help me forget his touch. I need you to love me until I can forget.”  
Understanding connected in Rip’s mind. Beth was not resting because she was having flashbacks to her attack. Everyone had assumed Beth’s physical pains were what would hurt her the most, but Rip had seen into her soul enough to know for all of her curt comebacks and aggressive language she carried emotional wounds that controlled her more than physical pain. He should have known this would be no different.   
Rip wrapped his arms gently around her and pressed a kiss into the top of her head. “I can do that” he said as he pulled her away from the doorway to the living area. Not trusting himself to give her the time she needed if he took her to his bed, he slipped her coat down her arms and folded it over the arm of the couch. He looked into her eyes again, “Promise me you will tell me if anything hurts or makes you nervous, ok?” Beth nodded her head yes and gazed back at him trusting him to know what she needed even though she didn’t really know herself. 

Rip began at her face, barely touching her skin with a feather like touch from his fingertips across each bruise. Then he kissed each cut and scab on her face, tasting the saltiness of the tear that rolled down one check. Next he stroked and kissed the skin on her neck that was bruised and fading from red and blue to yellow and brown. Then he soothed the skin on Beth’s shoulders and chest that were visible above the nightgown she wore. He finally walked around to her backside and lifted her hair out of the way to stroke and kiss the bruises on the back of her neck and near her shoulder blades. 

Rip reached for the hem of the silky nightgown and pulled it up and over her head laying it on top of her coat. He purposely stayed at her back to ensure the feel of his touch remained soothing and comforting, not sexual yet. Beth had fewer bruises on her lower back but he still took his time stroking down the edge of her spine and spreading out it each side. He shifted to facing her front again and took in her beautiful bruised face before he moved his attention to her stomach. “Shit, Beth! God, I’m sorry!” Rip’s voice held an edge of anger as he took in the large bruise on her abdomen. She had laid naked across his chest in her bed the second night he slept with her in the lodge and he hadn’t even noticed this one. It was a large and odd shaped bruise but had to have come from a sucker punch or knee to the stomach. He got down on one knee and spread kisses over the bruise, looking up at Beth’s face to look for even the slightest grimace. He slid his hands up her sides brushing the sides of her breasts and she let out a soft moan. Rip looked up from kissing her stomach and made eye contact as he took the weight of her breasts into each of his hands, caressing until her nipples stood firm against his palms. Kissing the bruise on her stomach down to where it met the waist of her jeans, he felt Beth become tense as him removed his hands from her breasts to unbutton and unzip her jeans. He didn’t pull them down yet, but ran his palms down each jean clad leg to the boots at her feet. He gently tugged off each boot and sat it in the floor beside her other things.   
Finally, Rip looked up and waited for Beth to make eye contact and nod her head in permission before he slid the open jeans down over her hips and thighs revealing a sweet little navy thong of satin and lace. However, Rip’s sexual attraction was put on hold as he saw two matching angry bruises, one on the inside of each of her thighs up high near the juncture of her legs and pelvis. Self-conscience about these angry bruises, Beth reached her hands down to cover them as Rip worked to control his anger. If he ever met that son a of bitch in hell he’d have no mercy on him.   
Rip thought he’d made it in time to prevent it, but now he wasn’t sure so he had to ask, “Beth, look at me...did...did he rape you?” Beth immediately shook her head no but it took her longer to find her voice. “No,” she said. “But I was so scared he would. I pushed him too far, Rip. I was so out if it with pain by the time he put me up on the table, I couldn’t fight him with my body. But I knew to have attacked me like that he had to be one of those men. You know, the kind who only get hard if the woman is crying and begging them not to do it. So I told him I wasn’t scared, that I new he couldn’t get it up for someone who wasn’t scared. It made him angry, he grabbed me here and squeezed as hard as he could. Then he held the gun under my chin trying to force me to be scared and I was almost at my breaking point.” The jumbled words fell out of Beth’s mouth, she shivered like speaking the words made her relive the moment. “Then suddenly you were busting through the glass wall and it was over. If you hadn’t come in that moment he would have broken me down and then he would have raped me.” Beth swirled her hands through Rip’s hair. Needing the contact to ground her in the moment and not the flashback. Rip leaned his face gently against her stomach and wrapped his arms around her waist in a hug. “If only I’d been able to get there faster...sooner,” he said.   
Beth pulled back and leaned down to his face to kiss his lips in a lingering kiss. “No doubts, baby. You got there as fast as you could and took damn bullets to save me. You prevented the worst.” She kissed him again, hinting at passion that was starting to run in her blood again.   
Rip pulled back from her kiss and bent lower to kiss the two bruises on her thighs while his hands caressed the back of her thighs and ran up over her butt to slide under the thin straps of her thong and give it a tug down her legs.   
Beth’s breath caught on a moan as Rip’s lips moved higher up her legs to the center of her passion. Sixteen year-old Rip had never tried this move and she had yet to experience this wickedness from Rip’s mouth and fingers together during their more recent love and ignore moments. She ran her fingers through his hair and when she was getting too close to completion she gave his head a tug backwards. “Together” she said, indicating she wanted them together for this important blissful moment.   
Rip stood up and leaned in and whispered in a deep rumble, “you’re in charge” as he pulled Beth over to the couch. She pulled on the button of his jeans as he opened his shirt. He helped unzip his pants and in seconds had his jeans and boxer-briefs on the floor as he eased himself down to sit on the couch and beckoned Beth to straddle his hips. She eased him into her body and leaned her chest against his so that his chest hair tickled her nipples. Beth has careful not to rub his still healing wounds from being shot, and she truly wasn’t sure if she should laugh or cry at the image they must make loving on each other all bruised and wounded.   
Rip gently stroked over all her body and let her set the pace for the loving. He was counting backward from 100 trying to keep himself under control when he felt the change in her breathing and change in her rhythm that indicated she was getting close. He slid one thumb down to caress her near where they joined and Beth’s body gave into the tide of completion that swept through her. Sure that she had found physical release, Rip let himself go and chased her over the mountain of passion.   
Beth was overwhelmed with physical feelings and emotions and a dam inside her seemed to crack. Not caring that she still straddled his lap she leaned in and hid her head in crook of his neck as the quiet sobs shook her body and hot tears rolled down her cheeks onto his chest. Rip was smart enough not to ask questions and simply surrounded her with his arms and stroked soothing circles on her back. About five minutes later, Beth seemed to hunker down control on her emotions and kissed her way up Rip’s neck to his mouth. “Thank you,” she whispered against his lips before leaning back to look in his eyes.   
She wasn’t ready to walk back to the lodge yet, but she seemed unsure what move to make next.   
Rip racked his brain for ideas to keep her there and to guarantee she would stay safe for a little while longer. “Want to take a shower? The warm water will loosen up your muscles to help you go to sleep,” he suggested.   
“Um, sure,” Beth stood and let Rip lead the way to the bathroom with a walk in shower. He reached in to turn on the water to warm while she stared at his strong naked body. In their 20 years of this on and off “thing” she wasn’t sure she’d ever taken time to just really enjoy looking at his body. Solid as a rock, not bulky well-defined muscles, but firm strength moved under his skin from his head to his toes. “Can you shower with your wounds? Do we need to tape them up?” She asked and rolled her eyes at her own self. When had she ever played nursemaid?   
“I’m good, the doctor said it’s fine now to get wet and do normal movements if I don’t over do or stretch that side too much,” Rip said as he stepped in the shower and held out a hand to Beth.   
Beth stepped under the warm water and instantly felt the remaining tension leave her shoulders and back. Rip took a bar of soap and created a lather then he gently spread it all over her body. He loved how smooth her skin was and the water and soap made his hands glide right over the flair of her hips and curve of her breast. Not letting Rip have all the fun, Beth gently pushed him under the shower head to wet his hair. She poured some shampoo in her hand and massaged her hands over his scalp. As the water washed away the shampoo, suds slid down his chest and flat stomach and drew her attention to his returning erection. Rip looked sexy as hell in his jeans, chaps, and jacket on any given day. But Rip butt-ass naked under a spray of water while he rubbed her body was enough to make the strongest woman want to swoon.   
Rip could read the desire in Beth’s eyes and while shower sex would be fun, tonight was more about Beth’s needs and keeping the two of them connected. He rinsed them both off and grabbed the towels he had set out to dry himself and handed one to Beth to dry. When they were mostly dry he took Beth’s hand and guided her up the steps to the loft area where his queen sized bed was.   
Standing beside the bed he pulled her against him and kissed her until they both were frantic to join their bodies again. Beth moved first by laying down on his bed and beckoning him down on top of her. Sensing that it was a sign that she want their loving to be more passionate like it usually was, Rip only held back a little as he entered her body and began to move. Beth arched up to meet his hips and moved toward completion faster than usual after all that relaxing shower foreplay. Rip kissed her firmly as he drove into her body, trying to say he loved her without using the words again yet. Her body seemed to chant the words right back to him and before long they were both crying out in completion. Beth slumped back on the bed looking at Rip through drowsy eyes. Rip took one of the discarded towels and made sure they were both cleaned up then climbed in the bed beside her and pulled the covers up over them. “Thank you,” Beth whispered.   
“Anytime you need me I’m here, now rest,” Rip replied.   
“When will you head to the barn?” Beth asked.  
Looking at the bedside clock that said 12:05, Rip answered “In about 5 hours”.   
“Ok, wake me when you go,” Beth whispered in a yawn as she snuggled in against Rip and went right to sleep.   
It was a deep sleep and Rip was quite frankly afraid another flashback would come to Beth. His mind replayed that night, the utter fear he felt driving into town as fast as he could, the uncontrollable anger he felt when he saw that bastard holding her down with a gun under her chin, then the crazed look in her eyes before he told her he loved her. He didn’t know what their future held but he hoped one day he could say it again. And maybe, just maybe, she might return the words...


End file.
